Photos and videos from last night’s excellent Smashing Pumpkins gig are here.
Photos and videos from last night’s excellent Smashing Pumpkins gig are here.
And the mix:
A few years ago I booked tickets for my friend and I to attend the premiere of Madonna’s film W.E. as part of the London Film Festival. It was due to be held on a Sunday night and nothing suggested it would be anything more than a screening – it was hardly a blockbuster, after all. So it was that we rocked up to Leicester Square, very hungover from the night before and resembling buskers, to find that we were attending a full-blown Hollywood premiere replete with hordes of onlookers and media. We had to queue in a line full of people in very expensive tuxedos and dresses to enter the Square, whereupon we found ourselves thrust onto the red carpet. I was in something of a daze as I walked towards the cinema, cameras flashing around me and faces I recognised roaring into view. My friend suddenly got very animated and pointed to my side. It took a moment but then I saw her – Madonna, stood a couple of metres away from me. It was a surreal, disorienting moment – my friend told me to stand in front of her and he snapped a couple of photos before a security guard appeared and shouted at us to keep moving – but more than anything I couldn’t quite believe that the woman beside me was Madonna. Madonna. A presence so enormous, so overwhelming, such a cornerstone of popular culture that she couldn’t possibly just be a person, could she?
There’s a famous clip of a young Madonna, asked by Dick Clark on American Bandstand what she hopes for her career, responding with ‘to rule the world’. She radiates charm and self-confidence but no-one at the time, surely not even Madonna herself, could have anticipated that she would not only rule the world but transform it. Madonna became one of the extraordinary, and extraordinarily rare, titans of culture who reach a level where it’s impossible to imagine our world without them. She is just there in the same sense that Shakespeare or Star Wars or karaoke is there. To say Madonna is the most successful female artist in history is like saying Coke is the most successful soft drink, so mind-bogglingly enormous as to become meaningless. Indeed, she may be the most famous woman on the planet but her status as a cultural icon is so established and unassailable that it’s inevitable we would forget she’s just a person, with everything that entails. She’s the object of endless throwaway opinions and casual cruelties from people for whom she’s as impersonal as Coke. Yet one woman really did all that.
Todway that woman turns 60. As shocking and devastating as the deaths of Michael Jackson and Prince were, it somehow seems apt that Madonna would be the member of the ‘Triumvirate’ to stay the course. That doesn’t necessarily work to her advantage – we like our cultural icons to be ethereal and unchanging in ways which an ageing, flawed person can’t possibly be and for all her fuck-ups and failures, much of the shit Madonna gets is because she can never be the ‘Madonna’ most people remember or imagine. Nevertheless, the world will miss her when she’s gone and it’s heartening that at moments like this there’s a taking stock, a recognition that she’s worth celebrating while she’s still around.
I don’t have to write about what Madonna means to me because I’ve done it many times before. Suffice to say that Madonna has saved me in ways too numerous to mention and too profound to articulate. The song which I return to most often from her last album, Rebel Heart, is the title track – it captures something of the ache I’ve felt that Madonna soothes:
Thought I belonged to a different tribe
Walking alone, never satisfied, satisfied
Trying to fit in but it wasn’t me
I said ‘oh no, I want more, that’s not what I’m looking for’
So I took the road less travelled by
And I barely made it out alive
Through the darkness somehow I survived
Tough love, I knew it from the start
Deep down in the depth of my rebel heart
I’ve never felt that I fit in but that has allowed me to fully understand the transcendent power of truly exceptional pop music, of the kind Madonna has created over and over again. Whether it be singing in my own living room or dancing in a room filled with friends and strangers, Madonna’s music revitalises me (makes me feel shiny and new, you might say) and makes me feel alive to possibilities which the grind of daily life can cause to slip from view. When I celebrate Madonna’s birthday at the Royal Vauxhall Tavern tonight my heart will swell with joy and I will feel that I’ve never belonged anywhere more than I do on that dancefloor and never been a better version of myself than I am when I’m dancing. Madonna is only one person but she has made my world, and the world of millions of others, immeasurably better (and a whole lot more fun).
Happy birthday and thanks, Madonna. Sorry we looked a mess on your red carpet.
In no particular order.
A few years after the infamous MTV kiss with Britney Spears (poor Xtina) Madonna revealed how she had explained it to her daughter:
“I am the mommy pop star and she is the baby pop star. And I am kissing her to pass my energy on to her.”
Certainly at the time, Britney Spears was the nearest thing we had to a ‘new’ Madonna and this was reflected in her increasing involvement in her own music. 2003’s In The Zone had featured 8 Britney co-writing credits, easily the most direct creative involvement she had yet had on her albums. Appropriately enough it was also the album to feature Madonna in its lead-single, ‘Me Against the Music’. Truly there was a sense that Madonna was anointing a chosen successor.
It didn’t quite work out as planned. While Madonna rebounded quickly from the failure of 2003’s American Life, it would be four years before Britney Spears released another studio album. And what a four years they were – Britney went haywire, quickly and decisively moving from an American sweetheart to a TMZ poster child for celebrity dysfunction and drama. She went off the rails in a way Madonna never had. However in doing so (and retreating once again, no doubt due to necessity, from creative involvement in her music) she ultimately delivered the album of her career. Blackout, which is five years old this week,is an almost-perfect postmodern pop album. Yet while it is different in many ways from Madonna’s work, it’s impossible for the ‘baby’ to fully escape ‘mommy’’s influence.
Conveniently enough, the Madonna album which Blackout owes a debt to is also having a birthday this week. It’s 20 years since Erotica was released and while time and familiarity has dulled its power, even today it sounds like an odd pop album. Madonna, coming off the back of the mega-selling The Immaculate Collection and the acclaimed Blond Ambition tour, was having one of her imperial phases (as Neil Tennant so memorably called the periods when commercial success and critical acclaim align for artists). She had cuckolded Pepsi with the Like A Prayer video; she had confronted the Catholic Church when it criticised her tour; she had even made MTV look uncool and turned its ‘ban’ of the Justify My Love video into both a money-spinner and an eloquent attack on moral hypocrisy. It’s understandable that she felt untouchable – but even so, few were expecting what came next.
In retrospect, of course, it’s easy to see that having pushed the buttons of the religious establishment and the moral majority, Madonna had to tread carefully. Moving swiftly onto an album called Erotica and an accompanying coffee table book called Sex was supreme, almost reckless, hubris and it led to the biggest backlash of her career. I can remember the period well – the tabloids had anti-Madonna stories on an almost-daily basis while the publishing of a book called The ‘I Hate Madonna’ Handbook summed up the prevailing attitude. Madonna has since said that the overlooking of Erotica amidst this maelstrom of controversy and recrimination is the biggest regret of her career. 20 years later the album is not quite popularly regarded as a ‘lost classic’ but it’s certainly seen as underrated and its influence is undeniable. Few grasped it at the time but Erotica is that most cumbersome of beasts – a concept album. Understanding this goes a long way to putting its strangeness in context – and boy, it is strange. It is difficult in a way none of Madonna’s previous work had been, the pure pop moments such as Deeper and Deeper and Rain sitting alongside jazz and blues influenced excursions which offer little ‘give’ to listeners. The decision was taken to use Madonna’s heavily processed demo vocals for much of the album, causing her to sound detached – on tracks like Bye Bye Baby and Fever she sounds like a sneering impersonation of herself. These sit uncomfortably alongside much more emotionally engaging material like Bad Girl and the gay rights anthem Why’s It So Hard? It all makes for a disorienting experience. Yet it’s intentionally so – as Madonna states in the album’s opening line, “My name is Dita, I’ll be your mistress tonight”’. Shep Pettibone’s ‘Erotica Diaries’ make clear that Madonna was in creative control and the irony of an album called Erotica which deliberately pushes the listener away is a masterstroke. It underlines that the album is not only about sex – it’s fundamentally about relationships and power. Indeed, much has been written about Madonna ‘opening the door’ for subsequent artists with her use of sexual imagery. This is missing the point. Madonna was very careful not to present her sexuality as mere titillation and Erotica’s genius is that she has the bravery to make a pop record which turns expectations upside down. Rather than being a come-on to ‘fuck me’, Erotica could more appropriately be described as ‘fuck you’.
Blackout could be similarly described. Its opening line has obvious echoes of Erotica’s – “It’s Britney, bitch” is an uncompromising invitation – command, even – into Britney’s world. What’s fascinating, however, is that whereas Madonna invented the persona of ‘Dita’ to play with her listeners, the character here is ‘Britney’. This is the fundamental genius of Blackout. At its core is the absence of its main star. Circumstances undoubtedly dictated this yet the producers took the ‘fuck you’ template of Erotica and went crazy with it. The album makes a virtue of her lack of presence, from its ironic almost-mocking title to its production. Britney’s voice is twisted, treated, transformed though-out so that she often doesn’t sound like ‘Britney Spears’. Instead she sounds like a demented robot, another production tool in an orchestra of sonic wizardry that goes far beyond anything on any previous Britney record. If Madonna played up detachment on Erotica, here it becomes the entire focus. In that regard Blackout is also a concept album – one about modern fame and modern pop music. Its power rests almost entirely on the persona of ‘Britney Spears’, not the person. The associations of that persona feed into the music and lend it an uncomfortable power – we know that as a person she is damaged and unhappy, yet as a popstar she is all-consuming. This subverts a dominant notion in modern pop – namely that the context is irrelevant and all that matters is whether a song is any good or not. We are under no illusion that Britney Spears had anything to do with most of this record – but the album confronts that head on and makes it into a dazzling virtue. As with Erotica, there is nothing seductive about Blackout – instead its pleasures lie in the confounding of expectations and the contorting of Britney’s image. “You think Britney and her music are manufactured? Fuck you. How about this?”
The contrast to be found between Madonna’s control in Erotica and Britney’s lack of it in Blackout speaks untold volumes about the differences between them. Yet in both cases the albums use their context as a weapon and make the listener complicit in their message. This more than ever underlines the truth behind the often-trite mantra that ‘manufactured’ music can be dazzlingly brilliant and, fundamentally, speaks to the power of pop music. Perhaps, in some small way, that’s what Madonna was passing on with that kiss.
You can’t argue with that.
My first Bowie memory is of listening to ‘Life on Mars?’ which, as I wrote previously, “exploded from the cheap, tinny speakers in technicolour”. In retrospect it feels like a moment when life itself burst into technicolour, when the narrow confines of my perspective collapsed around me and I found myself alert to exciting, daunting possibilities. Listening to that song, I caught my first glimpses of Oz.
As an artist Bowie tore up my notions of what popular music could be. I will remember sitting in that room, being carried somewhere completely alien, for as long as I still have my faculties. I’ve come to understand that it wasn’t just the strange, wonderful music which grabbed me but also the aching alienation which pulses through ‘Life on Mars?’ I’m not sure I yet had a real understanding of sexuality but I knew I was different from most of the other kids. I knew I was lonely and I knew I wanted something more, even if I couldn’t begin to conceive of what that was. “Is there life on Mars?” spoke to that, a plaintive yet hopeful howl that there had to be something, somewhere else out there (…over the rainbow).
As with so many queers my age and older, Bowie spoke to something within me before I necessarily could even articulate what it was. He helped usher me through some very difficult years to a life I could never have imagined. I never dreamt that I would get to be/The creature that I always meant to be. The Oz I glimpsed in ‘Life on Mars?’ came roaring into view and it was magnificent, even that sense of alienation has never quite gone away; I’m not sure it ever does for people like us. Yet for that, there was always Bowie. Always Bowie.
When I woke on a dark, cold Monday in January to the news that Bowie had died, it felt for a few days as if the world had been plunged back into black and white. In what became a year of dismal shocks, his death remains the thing which most affected me. I cried a lot the day I found out. I cried in Berlin a couple of weeks later as I visited his old haunts.
I wept at Bowie’s appearance in the Oscars ‘In Memorium’ video; at the Brit Awards tribute where his band was largely made up of the same people I saw him perform with in 2003; at the end of ‘The Perks of Being a Wallflower’ which I watched repeatedly when I was drunk:
I ended the year welling up at Bowie’s music making an appearance on the soundtrack for the London fireworks. Yet as I find myself in another cold, miserable January, about to enter the anniversary of that bleak Monday, I find my sadness lifted by the knowledge that the world didn’t become black and white again. I made a whole new bunch of Bowie memories: in Berlin he soundtracked a memorable encounter with a Syrian couple; I laughed with a room full of people at a BFI Bug special devoted to him; I went to see Lazarus on a glorious November afternoon; I headed down to the South Bank Centre one Friday after work to see Paul Morley speak about him and hear a choir sing some of his songs; I felt a visceral thrill when he appeared on the screens at a Placebo gig in December.
He’s not gone. He never will be. I don’t think I will ever feel fully at ease in the world and David Bowie will always speak to that. He helped me to accept it, even to celebrate it at times. I will always miss him but as the sadness falls away with time what is left is the sheer joy he has brought me, and which I now know he will always bring me. The world is still technicolour. Oz is still within my grasp. And yes, there is life on Mars.
Given singles are increasingly irrelevant, I’ve done a list of songs I loved this year.
In no particular order, though ★ was definitely my number 1. It goes without saying that three artists loomed large in my listening this year and here are the posts I wrote to mark their passing:
George Michael died late in the year, during that period when everything grinds to a halt. I marked it on Instagram.
2016 was a fucking terrible year in so many ways. I hope 2017 is better.